Friday, May 27, 2011

a military wife rant.

I'm now going to post a small rant on something that has been on my heart for a long time. I'm totally entitled to these opinions, and this is my blog. Okay. Now proceed:

I hate when people make military wives feel like they cannot voice their feelings or "vent" about their situation or missing their husband. It drives me absolutely crazy. It seems as if the majority of military wives have the opinion of "Someone ALWAYS has it worse!" Yes, that's nice. Good for them. But that doesn't mean that we don't miss our husbands. Or that it isn't hard for us. Or that we don't cry ourselves to sleep* or feel like our heart is absolutely empty every single day of our lives*.

I hate this train of thought. True, tech school is nothing compared to a deployment, but if a husband and wife are separated, guess what? IT'S HARD! Especially if the two are extremely close. I honestly feel like miltary wives make each other feel like you have to keep quiet and pretend like everything is fantastic, just so you don't step on someone else's toes. Because someone always has it worse.

What kind of logic is that, anyway? I would never, ever tell a civilian wife to "not whine" or "get over it" if she missed HER husband. Could you imagine telling a doctor's wife to get over it if she missed her husband due to his long work hours at the hospital? Um no. You would never tell her that she "married into it" so she should "expect it." Sorry, I did not marry the military. I married Mark. We are insanely close. He is my best friend. We do everything together. He wishes he could take me to work every day and we have the best relationship. We miss each other dearly. Sure, we get to talk to each other daily, but he happens to be across the world. Missing everything. And he's all alone. It s.u.c.k.s. and I'm not going to pretend like it's no big deal, because it is. It's a sacrifice for our country and family.

I do get a tad irritated when people complain about not seeing their husbands at all when they live in the same town and still get to live together. But if you miss your spouse, you should be able to freely say so without someone jumping down your throat. Deployments are no easy thing. Some husbands volunteer for them (bizarre, IMO...) but mine? He did not want to go. He misses his baby girl more than the world, and he can't wait to talk to me every chance he gets. He stays "home" to talk to me every single day, and I love him more than anything.

We're allowed to miss our spouses, and we're allowed to share our feelings. Someone will always have it "worse," but so what? That doesn't make our feelings invalid.

End rant.

*Note: I don't cry myself to sleep or feel alone inside or anything. Just for clarififcation.